Friday, December 9, 2011

I Don't Actually Understand Science At All

I think we should push the whole genetic engineering thing as far as we possibly can. You know, just to play God and make everything completely ridiculous. See, because I don't believe the whole "tampering with the things man was not meant to" thing. I believe that if we have the technology, we should laugh in the face of nature and make as many affronts to God's design as we possibly can. When some other species shows up and takes over this planet,* we should make them REMEMBER THAT WE WERE HERE dammit! Every time they look at the apples the size of watermelons growing in the backyard, they'll remember the crazy bastards that used to live here.

Cus we're already kinda doing this sort of thing, just on a way smaller scale. Engineering enormous strawberries and dogs with horrific inbreeding. All that good stuff. I think we should have the balls to tamper with the laws of the universe and make unnecessarily huge dogs that live for fifty years. And cats that can talk. Is that a thing we can do? It should be. All that funding we put towards important stuff? Child's play. Those glow-in-the-dark pigs are just the beginning people. Soon we will have pets that make zero goddamn sense. And it will be awesome.

Okay, so probably not, but I would love for the "genetically modified food" people to shut the hell up. You wanna not starve? Eat your goddamn Frankenstein carrots and shut up. You people are holding up the future.

*Either aliens or dolphins, really.

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