The Lane Is Tilted

You know what's incredibly boring? Bowling. This doesn't mean that it isn't fun to play. It certainly can be, and I imagine it's mind-blowing when you're high, but it's not very exciting, is it? I mean, it's basically rolling a heavy ball along the floor at some painted pieces of wood. There's really not a whole lot going on, right? There's no really no direct competition between the players, is there? Any sport that could be played over webcam probably isn't very involved.

Well, I call it a sport, but it really isn't, is it? It doesn't really take a whole lot of physical exertion. Once you get the whole "moving your arm back and forth" thing down, it's really not much of a struggle. Not a whole lot of sweating going on when you're bowling. And you get to sit down for pretty long periods of time if you're in a big game. Actually, that's the worst part about bowling. When it isn't your turn, it's boring as hell.

So I think there are some ways it could be improved. Somehow, I think it needs to be a contact sport. I mean, this is a game that has equipment that can weigh up to thirty pounds, and we're doing nothing about that! Make people dodge the bowling ball. Make it so that you have to roll it while running at a full sprint. Make it be done without the ball entirely, and the pins are all giant pillars that you have to slide into. There really isn't actually any reason to do any of this. I just like seeing stupid people getting hurt.