Thursday, June 2, 2011

And Why Do They Not Even Look Like Real Hearts?

I'm sure there's probably a very interesting historical reason for why hearts became the symbol of love,* but I find it a lot more fun to come up with my own reasons. I like to imagine that there was just some guy that everyone was convinced was right about everything because, I dunno, he predicted the rate of that year's corn production or something. So he started going on about how the heart was the center of love and all that nonsense, and everyone sort of just went along with it. Either he was completely insane, or he wanted to see how much crap he could get people to fall for.

Taking THAT a step further, I like to imagine that every urban legend ever can be traced back to this one guy who loved to screw with people.
"Well, you know, you only use 10% of your brain."
"But that doesn't even make sense Steve. How coul-"
"Bob, have I ever lied to your before?"
"Well, I guess not."
"Exactly. 10% of your brain. Oh yeah, and try not to swallow those seeds."

And then he started a multi-billion dollar soup industry by claiming it cured the common cold.**

*Or possibly a really boring story. Or maybe nobody actually knows. I really don't care that much.
**"Steve Campbell" sounds nice, but I don't think it's true.


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