Why do we still bother with shoelaces? I mean, we've developed like a thousand other methods for keeping our shoes on, primarily velcro, and yet we continue to strap them together with pieces of string. Why? What purpose does it serve? Did we all gone completely mental and decide that we were just going to make our lives slightly more annoying? We seem to do that a lot actually.
The thing about shoelaces is that they come undone.* How the hell does that happen exactly? It just seems to happen completely at random, doesn't it? And if you keep your eyes on your shoes all day, they won't come untied. So either they're some kind of really boring alien lifeform, or they're robots designed by shoe companies because....I don't know, I guess shoe companies just hate us or something.
Actually, I might be onto something there. They only make velcro shoes for kids, inadvertantly convincing us that only kids should wear them. Well I'm calling bull on that. We should totally bring those things back. That would be awesome. You wouldn't have to tie your stupid robot shoes anymore.
*Captain Obvious away! (woosh!)
I wore Velcro shoes until halfway through seventh grade, when I realized that they were cheap and broke almost immediately. If they made Velcro out of Kevlar.
ReplyDelete