Wednesday, July 13, 2011

The Universe Is Broken Part 5

The idea of plumbing scares me a little bit. Not in a 1950s B-horror "Oh my God there are snakes coming out of my toilet"* sort of way, but in a "This is clearly some sort of sorcery, how the hell did they figure this out" kind of thing. I mean, when you read about how the Ancient Romans apparently managed to get indoor plumbing, it can get a bit bizarre. That's too much for my brain to handle NOW, and I'm using the goddamn Internet.

Then again, that sort of comes out sounding like the insane ramblings of someone who is really into conspiracy theories. "Ohh, you know who puts that water in your house? The GOVERNMENT! The government is evil, as we all know. Who knows what kind of horrific things they're doing with those pipes! I bet plumbers are secretly FBI agents, planning to take over the world through the limitless power of poor water pressure!" I think you need to have a balance between blind trust in the state and being a paranoid wreck with no social skills. Yeah, I still don't like you, 9/11 Truthers, no matter how many angry comments you leave on my website.

See, if the government wanted to put mind-control poison in our water, they would've done it a long time ago. Just because something would be scary doesn't mean the American government is all over it.

*Although I did read somewhere that this actually happened to someone, and "Ripley's Believe It Or Not" has never lied to me before.

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