Natas Liah

I think it would be fun to start a rock group and DELIBERATELY put evil, Satanic messages into my music. I mean, the whole "there are backwards messages in Stairway to Heaven, let's crucify Led Zeppelin" fad is kind of over, but I believe that there will always be stupid people in the world to proclaim the downfall of society, so I think it won't be too hard for it to make a comeback. And then, once they pull me into court and say that I'm corrupting their children, I whip out the first amendment and say that I can put whatever I want in MY music. Then I'll do a whole bunch of coke and get caught having sex with a car in a motel parking lot, because THAT IS THE ROCKSTAR WAY.

See, because people don't care if you're up from about being a Satan-worshiping nut-job. Bands like Mayhem, who participate in ritual sacrifice, church-burning, and generally being massive twats don't get as much attention, because everyone knows they're trying to corrupt society. Because they told us. But when you have a bunch of guys like Judas Priest, who just want to get high and play music, the moral guardians want to expose them as EVIL SATANISTS who want to TURN YOUR CHILDREN TO THE DEVIL, because there's a certain level of intrigue there. They're not outright SAYING they worship Satan, but that's just because they're so CRAFTY.

And of coure, screaming that something is evil and trying to corrupt our children is never a good idea, because that just gives it more exposure. That's why all the Grand Theft Auto games sold so well. When you stir up controversy about something, you just give it free publicity. And that's why my terrible, possibly Satan-worshipping rock band is going to be huge. Well, it would be, if anyone actually listened to rock anymore besides people who ALREADY worship Satan. Okay, new plan. Rap group that glorifies violence. That'll sell.